I’m the elevator, this bloke gets in from the hedge fund wankers’ floor.
bloke : “Have you been outside yet?”
me: “what”
bloke: “I was wondering what it was like outside”
me: “its pretty warm?”
bloke: “You have no idea whats going on outside being in this building. I mean this lift is ice cold, its basically winter in here. my nipples are totally hard.”
me:
me:
me: “what”
bloke: “my nipples are hard!”
me: “FUCK THIS FUCKING ELEVATOR AND FUCK YOU”
*ding*
